5 day Blastocyst

5 day Blastocyst

Monday, April 5, 2010

Like Honey To A Bee

Today - 10dpo – I have now stared at the POAS about 200 times and it is only lunch time! I started the hpt 3 days ago which in it self is ridicules. To be able to get a positive that early is virtually impossible. There are of course exceptions to the rule. The reason I have looked at the evil little stick is because every now and then it looks like a faint line and then again –voila - no line. It is driving my nuts. How can a person imagine things like this? It is just insane. I just want time to click over til tomorrow so I can do another test. It is amazing how addictive they are when you start. I bought one during lunch as well – different brand but definitely no line there. (i.e very expensive too)

When we started to TTC I never ever bought the evil stuff – just waited until the witch was here and got sad. Since I started ivf about a year ago I been totally addicted. A couple of month back I bought a 50 pack on the net – which means the little buggers are very cheap – and I am finding myself doing one test in the morning and one in the evening. Hubby would forbid me if he new.

It is very odd that I put myself through this pain – I would almost say that since I started my addiction it always was one test at least that gave me some hope. Is it something there? Yes!? No!? But it is like honey to the bee – impossible to go past it. I just have to see if my dreams are coming true…as soon as I can…now now now …I just want to know and please please please let my dream come true. Well, probably not this month – how stupid am I to actually still have hope?

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